A whinge

i know this is a sissy blog, about my sissy self, but i need to get this off my chest (and i am not talking about breast forms!!)

global warming

it is freezing cold here in the north of england, if it isn't snowing, its freezing or raining or foggy etc etc.  i have had enough of this weather now.  it is dragging me down, it is killing all inclination to dress up + any other motivations i may have.  the heating is on nearly full at home, and still i often feel cold.

since they (by that i mean governments, hippys etc) announced global warming and its effects we have definately started to be affected by them.  They said that global warming would cause extremes of weather.  this is correct - in the north of england we have had extreme rain, extreme wind, extreme floods, extreme cold etc.

however, we have not had any extreme warmth or sun.  last summer was one of the worst on record for sunshine and temperatures.

so tell me again about global WARMING........

This summary is not available. Please click here to view the post.

so that is january out of the way...  it is still very cold here in england, and i believe that this does have an effect on how girly i feel.  i love short skirts and flouncy summary dresses, but it is often too cold to put them on even in the house with the heating on!!

i just adore how long girls legs look in short skirts and how the skirts flare out over their shapely bums.

i have had compliments in the past about my legs, but how i wish that i had legs like the girl above!!

anyway, back to me!!!

continuing from my last post, i haven't really wanted to be girly since, however after a bit of steady surfing today, i am getting back into the mood.

last week i did manage to test out the "booty lube" that i had bought.  it was very different to using ky jelly and smelt very minty, which was a bit strange.  i did have a short go with my dildo, but it wasn't overly satisfying.  as i have said before, i just wasn't in the mood - it was more like a woman going throuogh the motions to satisfy her man, rather than me getting a good deal of satisfaction out of it.

but now i am looking towards tomorrow with a glint in my eye!!!

OK so no post for a while.....
this has been down to two reasons, lazyness and .......

i have been feeling anything but "girly" lately.  it all started last wednesday, i just stopped feeling girly.  i had no intention to wear any female clothes, no intentions or inclinations to look at any sissy sites or related information.  i think subconciously i wanted to be a man!!!

this has happened before, but i cannot recall having such a "swing" from been so girly to so "not girly".

today i am sort of half/halfm, but i believe that once i put a bra on, i will be back!!!

females just do not realise how lucky they are, they get to wear a choice of lingerie every day to suit theie wants.

ann summers

well my stuff has arrived, and i have tried it all on very quickly.  i hope to post some photos soon of me in for you all.

the suspender belt is what i have been after for a while (metal straps) and the stockings are nice.

the two thongs are a little disappointing, and i haven't tried the lube out (yet!)

however the biggest surprise was the basque.  it fits very well and looks fantastic.  i would highly recommend it, even at full price.

i will take some photos of me in my new wig, and my old wig and we can compare them together.  i am not convinced with the new wig yet - i think i look a bit "mumsy".......

shopping at ann summers

was a bit bored and needed a pickup, so i went and looked at the ann summers website (a sort of victorias secret chain for you americans, although they do have some more adult novelty items....)

the following is what i have bought and i can't wait to try them on.

Black suspender belt

lace top stockings (a girl can never have enough of these)

pue satin red thong (to match my red satin babydoll)

lila thong (thought this looked too good not to have in my panty draw)

booty lube (do i need to spell out what i will be using that for.....)

florence basque

on reflection, the florence basque is the most feminine thought of garment i have ever bought.  i didn't actually by it in my size (12-14) or buy it because i liked the look of it (there are sexier items in the shop).

i bought it because it was on sale - how much like a woman is that - i did this without thinking.  what a bargain (£7), but it unlikely that i will ever wear it.  maybe i just needed a fix of shopping bargain heaven to make me feel better!!

Yay (shouted jumping up and down clapping my girly hands)

i have a follower.  or should that be a stalker.

either way i am not bothered, but i take it as a bit of a compliment that someone is interested in what i write and what i am doing.  in case i have managed to hide this too successfully, i am NOT a film/pop/tv star, in fact i have not even tried out for "the next wannabee pop, dancing, ice skating bug eating idol".  or would i ever consider it.

although maybe sissy idol...............

anyway thanks to Andrissa for been the first.

another first....

due to the current economic climate, we have had to make some staff redundant.  our secretary who i worked closely with was one of the casualties.  our buyer (another female) took her place, but we were all told to "share out" answering the phone.

after several months of me saying good morning / afternoon at the wrong time on purpose (just to hear the caller get a bit flustered and lose their train of thought), i dceided today to try and answer with a more softer voice.  i wont say female voice, but definately a little bit more effiminate.

well it worked!! as someone answered "hello love (a term of endearment to all females in yorkshire)".

i felt really girly and blushed a little to myself.

also today, my new wig came.  i will comment on that later as i get used to it...

playing computer games...

i have always loved playing computer games, and i still feel no different - or do i.....

i have a wii and enjoy wii fit (the female yoga trainer is so yummy).
i also have hannah montana dance game, high school musical dance game and all star cheerleader.

which sex did i pick for my cheerleader (need i ask), - she has a cute skirt and top and is very perky- oh to be her!!!

i am starting to feminise the way i play computer games - i even enjoy the shopping bit on hannah montana!!!

as a follow on from part of the last post, i will let everyone (or anyone) know what task i have set myself for january (at least).


since we have started back at work i decided that i should try to be more girly and do more things that girls do, so the main task for january is to pee like a girl i.e. drop trousers and pee, not peeing standing up. i know many of you are thinking that this is so easy, however let me briefly explain how and where i work.

i work for a construction company, and as such, part of my role is to visit sites to ensure they are operating safely etc. when we habve a lot of work on i spend roughly half of my time on site, and half in the office.

if you are not aware, the toilets on a building site are not the cleanest and sometimes only consist of a chemical toilet which has often been vandalised and has no seat, or sometimes no toilet at all (pee in a bucket, or in a corner or behind a wall etc)

you can probably see that this is now slightly more difficult.

also in our office the gents toilets have urinals and one cubicle. not a problem you say - use the cubicle at all times. i agree, not a problem, except for the embarressment flushing the toilet causes as the noise of the water filling up can be heard in the main office and reception area! - everyone knows when you walk out what you have just done. this embarrasement is obviouisly more for me as i flush the toilet several times a day!! the girl on reception is bit of a busy body, and it won't be long before she asks me if i am on an high fibre diet!!

should be fun coming up with a response as to why i am not man enough to use the urinals, and suggesting i should use the ladies!!

i also will be going for a night drinking with the boys where the pub/nightclub cubicles are dirty and questions would be raised if i was seen going into a cubicle.

so for everytime i pretend to be a man and pee standing up, i have to carry out the punishment (with the porn running)

i am a girl and girls sit to pee.

however today i comitted my first indescetion and pretended to be a man and peed standing up, i had no choice - the toilets were just so dirty and smelly, no girl would have gone in there.

i accept that i have to pay the consequences and so on monday before my hopeful session, i will carry out the punishment. i.e.carry out and complete the punishment before allowing myself to cum. *sigh*

looks like my arms will be aching.....*sigh*

an anal orgasm - with something extra......

wow, to all you girls that have never had an anal orgasm (or whole body orgasms as i prefer to call them), i suggest that you relax and keep trying as eventually it (and you) will cum.  having experienced several whole body orgasms i was not expecting what came next.

i have read on many occasions about milking a sissy and sissys who are able to cum without any penile stimulation (i.e. only from anal contact), but having tried this for several years and been unsuccesful, i thought it was either a myth or that i was not "wired up" that way.  it didn't bother me, i never got hung up about it, i was just happy to experience the whole body orgasms, which were fantastic (especially the recent ones).

however from what i have already wrote you can probably guess what i managed to achieve on wednesday 6th january 2010.  i was pounding my ass with my dildo and i had an ejaculation as well as an whole body orgasm.

to spell out and record exactly what happened, this is quite a long post (summerised above), so if you are not interested, don't bother reading the rest.  however like a girl who writes in her diary about the first time she has sex, i feel the need to do justice to this (at least to me) momentous occasion.

so here goes
i was extremely horny, and had been for a day or so (the previous day i had spent all day on my own in the office, just surfing sissy stuff).
it was also unexpected that i got home at lunchtime to be able to do this.

as soon as i got home, i stripped off, lubed up my rear and started to insert my largest butt plug (yes that is right - i went for the largest straight away!). i took this slowly and witha bit of pausing/relubing adn carefully waiting before taking a bit more i was able to take it all.  about 5 mins after it was all in, it began to feel a little more comfortable, and i was not afraid that it was going to pop straight out.

i am very turned on by masters and mistresses instructions, tasks and punishments.  i had been reading the sissymaster blog a while ago, and i remember his punishment for not following his rules.  it turned me on to try this out and now seemed the perfect opportunity.  below is a copy of the punishment (http://www.sissymaster.blogspot.com/)


If you break the rules, your punishment is as follows: Set a timer for 30 minutes. Go put a penny on the wall at shoulder height and hold it there with your nose. Keep your legs straight, and keep your hands above your head and not touching the wall or your head. Keep in this position until you hear the timer go off. I am serious about my rules, and breaking them will bring humiliating punishments that will not be fun or entertaining.

while i was gently taking in my butt plug, i was also surfing for some porn that would show a woman on top riding a cock for a decent length of time.  while i was doing this task i thought that i could enhance the humiliation of the the above assignment by instead of having a timer, i would use a 30min+ porn video, turn up the sound and be holding the penny in the next room. a sort of cuckold type humiliation hearing someone getting fucked while you are made to stand still.  i managed to find some "screaming" porn, where the girls were very "vocal" while they were having sex.

the humiliation aspect of this must really have got to me, as i stood in my butt plug and 4" heels only.  i was very turned on as i started the porn got into position.  well i can tell you that this is not a pleasant punishment.  my arms were aching after aboout 2 minutes and so were my legs.  my neck ached because the penny is at shoulder level (not normal nose level).  the screaming from the video was turning me on and i felt very belittled.

i only lasted about 8 minutes.  poor, i know.  but it was tough, i was horny and i was only "testing" the punishment.  however, i had already decided to use this punishment to punish me for not completing a sisy task i have set myself this month (more about to follow).

so i took of my heels, loaded up two different videos (both of noisy females) and paused them at the relevant points.  i got my dildo lubed up, butt plug out and sat on the dildo in time with the girl.

nothing particulary different here (only the videos were different)

howeverafter about 5mins when i switched to the second video, i noticed the girl leaning right forward (almost kissing the man) while still bouncing on his cock.  i tried this, it was a little uncomfortable and unnatural for me, however i did note that even when she was more upright,, she was very forward on the mans cock.  this may have been the key.  as i bounced in this more forward position i found myself copying the girl by screaming.

i was feeling excessively horny and i believe that i was hitting my prostrate continually.

i was feeling light headed and had to slow down a bit, but then built up speed again and just i was about to almost pass out with pleasure / dizzyness my cock started to squirt.  for every bounce down, more cum came out and with my cock (that was only semi hard) flopping about, the cum went everywhere - on my legs, carpet, arms, face etc

i then literally collapsed to the floor and was very very proud of myself!!!

the bits of cum that could collect up i gladly ate up without a single regret or remourse.

after regaining my breath, i rewarded myselfby having a normal "man wank" and i didn't eat my cum afterwards (which is probably my only regret).

so girls, i am converted.  i didn't think it was possible, but it is. take your time and hit the right spot repeatedly is the key i believe.

roll on monday......

a short story that i wrote in the style of sissystation

hope you all like, i will probably do a few more of these as time permits.

A day trip......

You start the day with your morning shower

Before putting on your tights

And beginning your daily make up regime

You begin your daily chores by doing the laundry

But mistress catches you getting excited about touching her panties

You must be punished

You are then told to grab your shopping bags

Mistress informs you that you are going shopping and then to the beach for some fun.

You are told by Mistress that you will need to buy a new bikini and this really excites you.

On the way to the beach Mistress decides to go to the harbour for some lunch and has you pose for a photo from a passing tourist.

Having gained a boost of confidence, you then decide to flash your panties, but Mistress does not approve

Mistress thinks you are been too saucy, so decides to skip lunch and head straight for the beach
The warmth of the sun relaxes Mistress and she helps you put on some sun screen

Mistress then decides to take a photo of you which shows how your new breasts are developing.

When you have finished posing, you put your bikini top back on and go for a swim to cool off.
When you return from your swim, Mistress is nowhere to be seen and a naked man has taken her place on your towel.


You are not sure if this is a test set up by Mistress or not, but you cannot miss an opportunity like this.

You soon forget to feel hungry as you begin to eat your own lunch!!

snow snow snow

we have a lot of snow at the moment, so much that i am the only one in work today, so time for a day of sissy searching etc on the net!!

the downside of this is that i cannot get home for any dressing, and secondly i was hoping to order some new lingerie and a wig, but i will have to wait now as i would not be at home to meet the postman.

i did order a wig, but asked for next day delivery charges, so it would be delivered today, however they havn't got back to me yet so it will probably be next week now. i ordered a short brown wig, mainly to compare the looks - i will post pictures and hope that someone comments on which looks best.

however i did have some "funtime" yesterday.

i was quite desperate to fell my dildo sliding in and out of my pussy, so i was very eager.

as soon as i got home i stripped off and inserted my medium butt plug (i don't bother with the small one at all now) and then i fixed my silicone breast forms to my chest. i don't normally stick these on when i am only home for a short while (i just insert them in a bra) but i just felt like it today.

after fixing my chest, it was time for the largest butt plug, which i gently and slowly took all the way in - i am now beginning to be able to take this all the way on a regular basis and up to a few weeks ago, couldn't take it all at all!!

once fully in i danced about a bit to get the sensations associated with a full pussy and then put on my sexy babydoll. this looked lovely against my freshly shaved chest and breasts. i watched some porn for a bit (searching for another video that has a girl riding a cock on top for a while - most of them have a scene with the girl on top, but only for a short while, i want to copy a girl really riding that cock - please post any suggestions)

so i put on my favourite video (see a few posts back) and copied the girl. i didn't suck any cock though - i was too eager to have it inside me. i rode the dildo like a real whore and then laid on my back and pounded the dildo in and out. i don't feel like that is a good position (on my back with my legs in the air) as my arms have to reach down to pound the dildo - NOTE TO SELF -must build a fucking machine.

while i was doing this it felt fantastic (apart from my strecthed out arm) and my legs were shaking uncontrollably, so much so that i had to stop!!!

felt wonderful for about 3 hours afterwards, alas with the snow i may have to wait until next week to try again...

a happy new year to all

lets hope you get what you wish for be it...............

a visit from the lovely Miss Courtney

your girl friend finally giving you what you want

a nice cock to suck ona nice cock to play withyou giving a man what he wants

or even both you and your man getting what they want!!!!

Lets hope that 2010 is a very sissy year.

At last - some relief

it was not the fact that i had an orgasm, just the fact that i managed some time in stockings that was the big relief for me i think.

i started by using my medium butt plug, held in place by my gaff. after about 5 minutes i took this out and used by large butt plug. i was careful with this and slowly let in go in bit by bit, taking my time.

i was also wearing some hold up stockings, filled out bra and my short sexy satin negligee from ann summers.

after about 10-15 minutes i felt the large butt plug "pop in" and i realised that i had managed to relax enough to take the full butt plug in (only the second time i have done this). this was not particularly comfortable as i could feel it pressing on my insides a little, but it was not painful - just filling.

i then loaded up my favourite video (the girl in the pink bedroom), placed my monitor on the floor and began to copy what she did.

my dildo got a good sucking, that made my neck ache a little as i tried to completely copy as near as possible the girl in the video

then, when it came for the time for her to remove her knickers, i took of my negligee, gaff and removed the butt plug..

after all the stretching, the dildo slid in easily to my well lubed hole.

it just felt delicious and somehow "right" as if it was meant to be there purely for giving me pleasure. as i bounced up and down on my dildo, i could feel waves of pleasure over my body and i actually moaned a couple of times as to how nice it was.

The video ends with the girl getting fucked on her back and the man driving his cock in and out quite quickly. as i copied this i believe i was hitting my prostrate continually, but i was unable to ejaculate. My arm was aching as i shoved the dildo in and out (as well as aching my arm was shaking from the feeling of been fucked) and i couldn't keep this up for too long, although i did keep it up as long as the video.

i suppose the way to look at it is as a man. the man in the video was shagging away until he came. if the girl did not come in that time, then it is tough on her (yes i know this is a sexist outlook, but many men do think this way)

now looking at it as the girl, she is left frustrated as the man came too quickly.

i would feel frustrated, however i did have what i consider a full body orgasm. i am not sure if it is possible to ejaculate, or if i want to (its not very ladylike).

anyway, i was shaking for ages afterwards, felt great and totally relaxed.

i did cum shortly afterwards, but to be honest it would not have bothered me if i didn't. when i did cum, i didn't feel an orgasm, it only added very slightly to how i was already feeling.

top and bottom of it....

1 ) i have one VERY lucky dildo

2) if you have never had a full body orgasm, then you don't know what you are missing!!

so its two and a half hours to go....

i don't think i have needed to have an orgasm as much for a long time. probably the thing that makes it so hard (pun also intended) is that non of this has been in my control. i have not tried not to have an orgasm (i.e.no self imposed chastity) it is just that i have not had the chance.

i can go longer without an orgasm, but i do want one!! and as my previous posts have said - i can't wait to have some anal action...

only two hours and twenty minutes...

Down to 6 (maybe 7) more chances for me this year.

Friday night came and went and i didn't cum. Wife still not 100% decided to stay in. i was going to shave my chest and maybe have a wank, but alas nothing.

40 hours now until my chance to be alone and meet my dildo!!

it is taking forever!!

CB-2000 - A warning

having bought a cb-2000 in order to help me with my girly training, i write the following to assist / warn others before they make any purchase on a chastity device.

as many of you may have read, generally the only time i manage to be alone and get girly is at lunchtimes - mon to wednesday althiugh it is ususally for at least a couple of hours at a time. so my thoughts were to buy a chastity device that i could put on at work, leave the key at work, go home and then tease my self silly with no release, then back to work.

i didn't want to pay too much, as i knew it was only for fun, and more as a trial. so after reading reviews, the only really bad thing said about the cb-2000 was that some men could manage to pull out. so i paid my £70 and waited....

i couldn't wait to try it on. i didn't have long, and i was very *excited* so it was a bit of trouble at first, but once i had it figured out, i had my penis locked away and put my clothes on.
the bulge was not particularly noticable, but due to the shape of the cage, was a strange shape (for a crotch area)

as i didn't have long i took the device off and waited for my chance. i was working at a relatives house doing some painting while they were on holiday. i was alone - perfect. i put the device on, got dressed again and started with the painting. it was uncomfortable at times, but nothing unbearable. you need to sit down to urinate (no problen there for me!!) or else it would go everywhere.

when i had finished painting i tried a little teasing and then i found to my horror that i could (quite easily) have an orgasm while wearing this device. if a normal wanking orgasm was rated at 100, the orgasm within the device was a 60-65. satisfying, but could be better.

i was gutted. £70 to stop me been able to orgasm and i managed it at the first attempt!

spoiler alert - highlight the following if you want to know how i managed it easily!!

i managed to get my little finger (i have small hands) partly through the cage and to the spot below the head of my penis, whhich with contstant stimulation produced an orgasm. i also tried it again once more using the handle of a toothbrush and found it very easy to do.


if you want a device that will stop you or your partner having sexual intercourse, then this will work, but it will not prevent anyone having an orgasm. be warned.

p.s. if you are the guy who bought mine off ebay, then sorry!!! - at least you havn't wasted as much money as me!!

Nothing New.........except for a purchase.

i have nothing to report except that i am extremely horny, some colleagues at work have said i looked "flushed" all day (can't see why - i am sitting at my computer reading sissy stories etc!!!), and that i need some release!!

a while ago i shaved my chest, but i didn't keep up with it, so the hairs are back (and have been for about 12 months). this will now however change. Today i have bought a babyliss male bodygroom shaver, that once charged up, i will use on my chest and underarms.

this is hopefully the first step towards becoming totally shaved. next step will be to "trim" my legs, maybe before christmas!!

hopefully i can keep up with this and become used to a girly regime of shaving and then using some scented moisturising lotion!!

As predicted

i wish i had as much luck with my lottery numbers.

as predicted, my wife is off work again today, hence no playtime for me until monday at the earliest. i am beginning to go insane, i am having urges and many impure and improper thoughts!!

One thing i have been toying with for a while is visiting a professional mistress. i have been looking around, reading reviews etc and *if* i decide to take the plunge, then i know which one it will be. She is very attractive, offers all of the services that i would require and co-incidentally she is close to my home - how close i do not knowbut i am certain it is less than a mile!!!

i am thinking about the new year for this though.

still got loads of sissy thoughts rushing through my head. i know from previous times that the first 10 days or so are the worst without an orgasm, but that doesn't help!!!