fashion life

as a follow up to my last post, and the comments made (a big thank you to happy pet and nathalia)
a few changes have been made and i will hopefully post about those later
trying to reinforce feminine thoughts and behaviours has become my new focus and i am been swiftly drawn in to the world of celebrity fashion

i am now almost exclusively browsing the internet for fashion and celebrity fashion blogs, clothing sites and gossip (only the type that is associated with the fashion e.g. sarah michelle gellar was seen picking her daughter up for ballet class, she was wearing........)  and to be honest i am not missing the sports/sex/comedy websites at the moment.

my self imposed ban on this type of behaviour is a real turn on for me.  i am doing things that a man would/should not do, and i am imposing the same sort of ban that i would expect (want!!) a master to impose on me.

my browser favourites bar (on my work computer) is now full of fashion and celebrity blogs, and i am not bothered who sees it as there is nothing pornographic on any of the websites.

i am enjoying the fashion blogs and i am beginning to feel that i know enough and am confident enough to start commenting on some of the outfits. - i have been doing A LOT of reading!!

i am currently only making small comments like "that looks hot", "not so keen on the shoes", "i think her make up should be toned down a little" etc, but i am starting to feel like i am dipping my foot into this community and that i have a voice like a girll

i am also very wary of sounding / looking like a fake and i am considering setting up an email/facebook etc account for the "female thinking" susan rhodes, rather than the sissy susan rhodes.  i am not too concerned over been exposed, i am morre concerned that my thoughts will not be taken seriously if someone realises i am a sissy.

after two days of immersing myself in feminine thoughts only, i find myself looking at ONLY the clothes.  sure, i am noticing that a girl may look sexy, but the clothes are/have become my focus now.  i am really pleased with this, and i think it is almost acting like a desexualisation of looking at women.

after reading the sissify yourself blog, and especially the post regarding looking at womens boobs (where one of the tasks was to look at some pictures and "not" look at the boobs of the girls) - i have noticed that i have looked at hundreds of photos of dresses and girls, and not once i have i noticed the girls boobs.  i could not tell you if any of the girls i have seen are flat chested or big chested, they were just girls wearing clothes.

i have never been a breast man, but i do consider this non-noticing to be quite a large step, maybe not in my feminisation, but definately in me thinking/acting like a female.  this has produced no change in my appearance etc, only my mind and browsing habits.

i am considering putting together a collage of clothing that i would like to buy/wear and what would suit me for various occasions.  maybe this would be the next step, putting some outfits together.  doing this would reinforce my understanding of clothes and have me spending time looking a girl things and doing girl things.

loads of girly, creative areas are flooding through my head right now.

just need a sugar daddy to pay for all the cute clothes i am currently in love with

a sissys frame of mind

for those that have read some of my previous posts, you may be aware that i was not really into my sissy side over the past few months.  it did come back a little, but now has come back a lot.

i am aware that as a man, i do tend to drift in and out of the sissy state.

currently i am deep in sissy space and just can't get enough.  instead of letting this flow away from me, i am trying to do somethings that will keep me in a girlish frame of mind.

1) i am currently trying to wear vaseline lip balm (in a little roll-up container like lipstick) all of the time, and refresh it regularly during the day.  i am currently refreshing it everytime i go to the toilet, and my goal is to the use the tube as quickly as possible.  there is a slightly tinted version of this (rose colour), and i will buy that next time, so hopefully it will add a bit of colour to my lips.  maybe this will lead to wearing nude lipstick in the future.

i am secretly looking forward to wearing the coloured lip balm, and i am hoping that it may leave some tell tale signs on a cup or glass, that i may miss....

2) only unisex or feminine scents for me

3) i am trying to limit my time surfing on the net.  not strictly true - i am trying ot limit the time that i look at "non-female" related sites to 1 hour a week.  this means that i can only check out sports sites or other general sites for 1 hour total per week.  the rest of the time i will be looking at sissy sites or womans fashion sites.  i keep the timer on my watch and stop/start when not looking at sissy / female related things.  anytime i forget to start the watch there is a 1 minute penalty.  i am hoping that this will keep me in a girly frame of mind, by overloading my maleness with girlyness.

4) i am only sitting to pee.  i know this should be a given, but i had let it slip over the past few months, so i am now reinforcing this again.

if there is anything else that other girls do to help reinforce their femininity / sissyness on a daily basis i would be grateful to hear so i could add them to the list!!

barbie and ken

i saw this picture on another website and i had just had to share it with you all.

barbie and ken in real life

now i can't decide if i want to be barbie or ken!!

as mentioned in previous posts i love disney, and this photo made me smile.  i wonder how many men would love to be in the position of jack sparrow, chased by all theses beautiful women, whereas i imagine myself as rapunzel!!

i am lucky enough to be going to florida again in a couple of weeks time.  apart from having a nice holiday, everytime i have returned from florida, i have been in a major sissy mood, so hopefully this will help to drag the sissy back into me!!

its coming back little by little

Hi all
i am not yet fully back into a girlish mode, but have been feeling more like it over the past couple of days (thanks for the encouragement - Happy Pet)

i have been reading tumblr a bit, although i admit that i hadn't really heard of it or used it before.  i have been getting a bit worked up.

meanwhile at work the company is "busy", but i can cope quite easily with the work, so much so, i offered to help one of our sub-contractors, who had said she was very busy, by writing some documentation for them.  the lady in their office was very grateful and actually replied "Thank you so much, if ever you are in need of sexual gratification, I would be happy to help you out in exchange for your understanding on this occasion."

as a man i have never been offered this before!!

however as a sissy, this does not interest me!!

so i laughed a little and said thanks.

today, i offered again, and this is how the conversation went......

"Do you want me to help you out?"

Your offer is like music from heaven to me at this time, and very much appreciated

"No problem, Glad to be of help to you"

Will you marry me?

* thinking i had to put something a bit sissyish in... *

"I am willing to serve you, clean up and cook will that do? Do anything that makes your life better."

I love you and when I am next in the office I will come to your room, shut the door and pleasure you in whatever you require.

"Making you happy is all the pleasure I need"

So i am currently dreaming that this might lead to me been dressed like this on a weekend and serving a Mistress...

Far far too long

Well it has been far too long since i posted anything, and the main reasons are...

1) i have just not felt sissyish for over 5 weeks - it is just not happening!.  i somethimes have a quick sissy urge as i read a story that hits a nerve, but the feeling soon disappears.  i am pretty mush just going through life at the minute as a male.

2) due partly to the above, nothing of any interest has happened to me.

the only things i would like to mention are that i had a couple of days off work, and on one of them i got dressed up, trying to almost force the sissyness back into me, but after a couple of hours or so the desire had totally drained away and i just went back to been a man with a few diy jobs to do.

i can't even motivate myself to add a picture to this post!!

one thing i will let everyone know about is www.mysissyschool.com

the mistress there is very good, and the community is slowly starting to build.  i was an active member, but i just keep checking in now and then.  again mostly due to the lack of sissy motivation.

hopefully some of you will find it of interest.

lego never seemed that much fun when i was younger!!

i saw this while i was reading a funny blog site, just waisting some time.  can you imagine been dressed up, going to a theme park for hte day in your finest dress etc, and then one of the animals did this!!

even the animals at the theme park think i am cute!!!

i have been toying with the idea of what to do with this blog.....
i don't want to let it die, but i am struggling for inspiration.

i don't have a lot of time to be a sissy, so i can't post about that

i have posted most of my files that i think you may be interested in.

my sissy captions are posted on my other blog (susanscaptions.blogspot)

i will not close the blog down (but cannot guarantee that some others may delete it).

so, i have decided to at least post a few photos that i find sexy, a turn-on, funny etc.  i do not intend to overload this blog with pictures, so do not expect a lot of posts, but i do not intend to abondon it yet.

i will post any sissy stuff i do ( i am still getting a few messages from my "husband" - so i don't know where that will lead).

anyway - onto the first photo, and all i could think of was wow!!! (and agree with the caption).  wish i looked 1% as good as that.....

new sissy phone, well actually just a new phone...

i have recently treated myself to a new phone, and have finally bought a smartphone (a samsung galaxy s2 to be precise)

i love the phone as it can do loads of stuff like connect to the internet, games etc.

so my sissy side is not wasted or lost in this macho techno thinking, one of the forst games i downloaded was "top girl" where i dress / style a girl, do jobs (no not that kind...) and get / keep boyfriends.

i am quite a way into it now (in New York for anyone who has played it).  the game is probably aimed at 12-14 yr old girls, but i am trying to keep in a girly state of mind, and what can be more girly than to keep checking my phone to see if my boyfriend needs a date/kiss or if some clothes are available...

if anyone knows of any other good "girly" games, or any sissy type apps that i should have, please let me know

thanks

Part 4 - The final chapter???

after logging off the site, i was despondant.  having gone to all that trouble i had just about wasted a full day, turned down several offers (about 15 or so!!), and had refrained from touching myself.

on a positive note though, i had spent the day as a girl and done only girly things which illustrated what i already knew - it takes a lot of time to be a girl!!

however as i only had the house to myself for another hour or so, i decided to put on some makeup and take a couple of photos of how i was dressed.  my initial plan was i will show him what he has just missed out on  (for the uk people - i call it a bullseye moment - lets look what you could have had!!)

after the photos i watched some porn and decided to bring myself to orgasm, which i did, but it was a little different.  i was sort of semi-hard, not hard-hard, and when i did cum i felt like i was pumping loads into a glass but when i looked i only found a very small amount.  i even felt around the floor as i thought i must have missed the glass, but nothing.  i had not cum for over 5 days and i am by no means a  "heavy cummer" but there literally about 4 drops of cum.  very strange. (the next day i masturbated and cum as normal).  maybe the girl in me had taken over!

here are the photos....

if you have read this far, then you will probably have either nothing better to do or were in some interested in what i had to say, so any comments would be appreciated.......

should i send one of these photos to him?
should i give him another chance?
should i just forget him?
should i just stop trying to arange some sissy sex for myself?

part 3 - the dressing / afternoon

continuing on from the morning i ate some lunch (just an apple and a slice of toast), hopefully to top up my energy.

i was getting very excited, but surprisingly remained "soft" throughout.  i don't think i got an erection all day.  i was very busy and time was going very fast.

having tried on my lingerie earlier, it was time to start getting dressed for the big date.  i was going to go for a simple bra and stockings, but decided since this was supposed to be our wedding night i would go for a pink and black basque, black lace top stockings and a black thong with pink trimmings.  i got the basque in a sale at ann summers (£8) and it was a bargain, just didn't have the occasion to wear it until now.

i intended to wear a simple black pleated miniskirt and a black blouse that is just like a mans shirt, but cut differently if you know what i mean, with 4" black heels.

i wanted to go for the demure, classy look, but then take it off to reveal a sex bombshell underneath.

i have a couple of photos that i will add onto the next post

time continued to tick away, without any further contact. it got to about 1.30pm and i decided that i should just set off in the general direction and then satnav my way once my husband got back to me.  i assumed he was waiting for his "sister (wife)" to leave at 2.00pm and then he would message me.

during this time i was still fending off other admirers

then at the last minute (1.55pm) i got the following message.....

sorry baby change of plan. son and his wife just turned up


at least i hadn't set off.......

it wasn't unexpected, as for the last hour or so i could just feel that it was going to go wrong.  but i was disappointed and a little mad as i maybe could have taken up one of the other offers.

we exchanged a few more messages as follows.

will they be staying long??


till sister gets home at 4-30. sorry my darling wife. dont be angry



i am just absolutely gutted, YOU would have had such a good time.

i am gutted too darling. was looking forward to our honeymoon xxxxxxxx

i am just about to get myself off using my dildo. REALLY wanted it to be you though



sorry babe, can we arrange again. what about hotel fun then no interuptions?




definately - i can set off now!!! - if you want
i will have to see what work brings tomorrow, and it wil have to be a monday or tuesday night though


cant now family here. monday or tuesday would be ideal



pity, today is the best day for me, i could have met you somewhere about 4.30-5

i will have to check with work next work, as i often work nights.
any evening will be good for me



ok i will have to see how it goes in the next week or so
x


you still have a loving husband darling



 
and that was the last message between us.
maybe it was genuine?

part 2 - the morning


i was in major, major sissy mode....
i didn't sleep very well, due to all of the excitement.  i got up at about 7.30am and started to plan the day ahead.  i was not meeting my husband until 2.00pm, although i would have to leave at about 1.00pm to make sure i got there in time.

first things first - breakfast - need the food for energy.  dressed in bra, panties and a dress with some flat shoes i went downstairs and had breakfast.  after breakfast i went to the toilet and then gave myself an enema (used a large syringe and warm water) to flush and clean myself out.  repeated this a few times over the next hour or so.

while having breakfast i watched some youtube videos on make-up and answered a few messages.  i had logged on to the website (  http://www.cottaging.co.uk/  if anyone is interested - i am not promoting it or slagging it off, my experience remains "neutral")  i got several offers which was a boost to my confidence (i had uploaded a picture and everyone said i looked nice etc) all of who wanted to meet that day or in the near future.  none particularly stood out, but by the end of the morning i had literally got fed up with saying no to people (okay i know that having admirers is not a bad thing, but i was waiting for messages from my husband)

i did respond to a fellow TV and we had a girly chat, and became friends.

my husband did log on and our initial exchange is as below.


morning susan

good morning hubby


how are you today


very well, how are you?


horny for my wife

desperate for my husband!!

thinking lots of dirty things about you


such as?


what you will be doing to me. i assume you have something that you can bend me over....



yes the kitchen sink or the washing machine


perfect!!!

are we still on for today then?


after 2 hopefully.. while you are here may get you doing some housework. maybe hand wash my other wifes knickers i know you are going to take advantage of me (thats why i am coming!!)




cleaning/handwashing no problem, i am your wife after all and i will do ANYTHING you ask


chores will come later in our marriage. as far as i am concerned the woman i live with is now my sister. you will take her place as my wife. you will bring the condoms too dont want to get you pregnant yet



i have already got the condoms, and i am getting my handbag together as we speak. i don't mind if there are chores to do today, as long as there is time. don't want to distract from our wedding night



tell your sister that she can maid of honour!! lol

i will keep checking back.
xx


i planned to spend the morning trying on clothes and doing my makeup so i could look my best.  i really wanted to nail the makeup, as i didn't want to waste too much time putting it on when i got there.  so inbetween the messages, i attached my silicone breasts to my chest and in bra and panties practiced putting on my makeup, different styles etc.

time soon passed and i recieved the following message from my husband at about 10.45am

good message you soon, sister just came in

i responded with...

tell your sister that she can maid of honour!! lol 

i will keep checking back.
xx


my idea was to be completely dressed in my lingerie, with just a jumper and trousers over the top.  i could then quickly do my makeup, pop on a skirt and blouse, add wig, instant sissy!!

time passed on and i had heard nothing so i sent a message to remind him, i just know how men can be so forgetful


as your sister left yet?

don't forget i am about 45mins drive away!!

Part 1

so this is how it all started.....(the man i am talking to is a bit of a TV himself, but he did say that he would be a man for me, as you will see..)

how are you tonight x

Hi
i am very well thank you. hope you are well too.
isn't the feel of panties nad stockings just the best!!
susan

yes love it. encased in pretty lingerie

i love the feeling of pulling up a pair of tights or stockings and how my clothes feel against them

me too. though i am not convincing. happy to be a man 4 u

i would say that i am not that convincing either (see my profile pic)

looks good 2 me

thanks, a girl likes to hear compliments!
what is your favourite look on a girl?

classy but sexy

one of my favourites is the sexy secretary, stockings, tight short skirt, white blouse, heels

could you play my younger wife

if it is a sexless marriage, then no!!
otherwise i am sure i could be your wife, but i think i would be sexier than a normal wife

not a sexless marriage. want you 2 be my wife and sex-toy

wouldn't have much time for cooking and cleaning!

no def not and no nagging either

you might go hungry though - i could have something to eat!!

do tell

i would consider part of my duties as your wife to make sure you were happy, and i can think of something that i would like to get my mouth around

thats what i want a dutiful wife

so when can we "get married" ?
i am free tomorrow during the day and can travel but can't accomodate

afternoon at 2ish wife

sounds fine ( a bit earlier would be better and give us (me) more time) but i can make 2pm work

will message you in the morning then with my address

excellant - feeling giddy now.

if you have anything particular that you would like me to wear then just let me know.
i suppose this is now my hen night!!
 
have you any more pics


i only have one saved on here.

can i see yours? (sent along a picture of me in a miniskirt adjusting my suspenders)
 
mine are in tights suppose so. just wear sexy undies future wife

ok. i can prob sort some out for early in the morning if you want some more pics.



 
dont matter i will see you in the flesh anyway



i am going to bed now, hopefully see you sometime tomorrow.

xx

one more thing u bring the condoms. i will get carried away and forget


ok, i will ( i assume you are ok with the safe sex oral and anal etc as my profile)

must remember to get some flavoured ones

if thats what you want. dont mind sucking you without a condom though


i would prefer it my cock stays in my panties, so i can focus all my attention to you

ok no problem wife



thanks, i don't want any misunderstandings to ruin our wedding night.

xxx

I went to bed then, didn't sleep well!! but the next morning i noticed i had recieved this message and then i responded..

ok understood. i forgot that bit dont nag me wife




ok no more nagging. can't wait to see you today, lover

xx



As you can see, i tried to be flirty, fitting my life around my "husbands".  not sure if i carried it off

just to let you all know - it didn't happen.  too mad / sad to go into details.  will post in a  day or so.

a quick post - sort of arranged a date for tomorrow to be an older mans young wife.  hopefully something will cum of this....

This summary is not available. Please click here to view the post.

thought i was busted at work.....

so here i am 6 months into my new job and one of the guys from upstairs comes into our office (there are 3 of us) and went to my colleague and said "here - have a look at these photos of him", looking at me.

omg i thought, he has been looking on line and found my blog, or other sites where my photos are displayed and has downloaded them.  time to face the shame......

only after i had gone bright red with shame and embarressment thinking what photos he had, did they finally reveal it wasn't entirely like that......  it seem he has been messing with photoshop and using a picture of me in boy mode, had inserted my face over some others.

i won't bore you anymore, or show you the ones i believe you won't be interested in (the male ones!!!), but theses didn't turn out all that bad......for fakes......although i wish i had a body like any of them!!!

maybe my nose needs to be a bit slimmer...

100 Followers

wow - a momentus day passed this last week or so as i have managed to get 100 followers, or 100 people who are interested in what i have to say.

the prize (if there was one) would go to Jenny G.

i am hoping to post a few things before christmas.

susan

Hi Girls

as you know it has been far too long since i posted.

i have not been up to much "girlywise".  i was made the secretary to a Master running a bit of a sissy group on yahoo, but after a busy start (where i was too busy to post anything on here about it), the group looks like it is dying and the Master does not seem interested anymore.  i would post the name of the group, and if it takes off i will do, but at the moment i feel i would be letting you down by doing so - its not worth joning at the moment.

i also have been in contact with a Mistress who asked if she could come and stay with me for a while!!  After the sissy dreams cleared, i realised that my wife may not like the idea so i had to say no.  i am one of Mistress' favourite sissys and we get on very well, so it was doubly disappointing.  i will ask her if i can link to her site, and i will post if i can.

anyway, looking to next week, i may, at last, have some decent sissy time.  if this happens i will take some photos as promised earlier and post them.  i don't know why some of you want to see me, but i will do what i am asked!!!!

------------

As part of one of the Mistress tasks issued was to buy some frilly satin panties and so i did.  i am more of a bikini / thong type girl, but these panties are absolutely fabulous and i just looooove them!!!

as mentioned in my last post, i bought a black miniskirt and white blouse - a sort of young secretary look that i really love (i have an older secretary look that i will include later). so here are some photos to pass the time on......Hope you like them. xx