Monday 1st August 2011

its 10.00pm and i have checked my email every 20 minutes throughout the day.  feeling down again, maybe i pushed my boyfriend too far.  i offered to do almost anything with him, as long as it was safe, but maybe he has had second thoughts.  i am sure i am not too fat, maybe i am too old.  i really did think he could be the one.

why don't men ever respond, are they afraid to say no thanks?

however, whilst i was checking my messages on cottaging, another man has got in touch.  i thought this would be some harmless flirting, so i thought "what the heck" and we flirted for a while.  he wants me to dress as a schoolgirl who has failed a test and needs to get some extra marks from the teacher.  i am loving talking to him, our messages are quite sexy.  he is dead keen to meet me, i think he must be thinking with his "other brain" again.

my new admirer was quite insistant throughout the day.  i have told him that i can't meet him this week, because i have another appointment (boyfriend) although he hasn't been in touch  :(

whilst waiting for my boyfriend, i am getting nervous about kissing him, what should i do with my hands?  i know what to do with my hands when i was predending to be a guy, but now i am a girl, what should i do?  maybe i should look this up.